Brick by boring brick
by mari6s
Summary: Songfic with Paramore's "Brick by boring brick". It all starts with a wish. And shouldn't we all be careful what we wish for!
1. Songfic

_Author: mari6s._

_Fandom: Once upon a time._

_Characters: Emma POV. Mentioned: Henry, Regina, Archie Hopper, Mary Margaret. _

_Spoilers: up to episode 17 (Hat Trick)._

_Disclaimer: I do not own this wonderful show… or the song!_

_Note: I read about Once upon a time in magazines a while back and thought that I should check it out. I finally did two weeks ago and forty minutes later, I was hooked. That show is my new obsession. I'm getting close to the end of season 1 and I have no idea how I'm gonna survive until the beginning of season 2 lol. I'll just have to find another obsession in the meantime…_

_Anyway, since I've been very inspired recently, I just had to write something about Once upon a time. I actually had several ideas, which I might use later, but this Paramore song just seemed so fitting… I've been writing a lot of songfics recently, probably because I've been listening to a lot of music! At first I wanted to write an Henry POV, but Emma kind of found her way to my keyboard… Hope you enjoy it._

_PS: for those of you that are bothered by the song coming in between the fic, I'm posting it separately in chapter 2. _

It all starts with a wish. And shouldn't we all be careful what we wish for! 'Cause before you know it, a boy shows up at your door. Your boy. And not only do you not spend your twenty-eighth birthday alone, but pretty soon you get a feeling that you'll never be alone again.

_She lives in a fairy tale_  
_Somewhere too far for us to find_  
_Forgotten the taste and smell_  
_Of a world that she's left behind_

That boy has a rich imagination, well, that's how Jiminy Cricket puts it anyway. But little by little, you find out maybe he's not _that_ crazy. Maybe he sees who people are on the inside more accurately than us rational grownups. Maybe he's right to call Regina evil, and maybe, just maybe, there is a curse on Storybrooke. If only metaphorically.

_It's all about the exposure, the lens I told her  
The angles are all wrong now  
She's ripping wings off of butterflies_

And what's so wrong about dreaming anyway? Just because you didn't get a chance to as a child, or well, ever, doesn't mean you should steal it away from Henry. Plus you're getting used to checking out what Regina does and considering the opposite as right.

_Keep your feet on the ground  
When your head's in the clouds_

But I guess you're scared that she might be right. That he may need to grow out of it, soon. And you still remember the terror you felt when he went into that old mine to get _proof_. Proof that the fairy tales in his storybook are true.

_Well go get your shovel_  
_And we'll dig a deep hole_  
_To bury the castle, bury the castle_  
_Well go get your shovel_  
_And we'll dig a deep hole_  
_To bury the castle, bury the castle_  
_Ba da ba ba da ba ba da_

Maybe you should just save yourself the trouble and get the hell out. Hasn't that been your MO since, like, forever? The weird thing now is you _want _to stick around. You _want_ to be there for him and build a genuine relationship, brick by brick, for the first time in your whole life.

_So_ _one day he found her crying  
Coiled up on the dirty ground  
Her prince finally came to save her  
And the rest you can figure out_

But what if you can't? What if you get his hopes up, then fall short and disappoint him? What if you blow it? Let's face it, you're no hero. You're a screw-up, always have been, always will be. Right?

_But it was a trick and the clock struck twelve_  
_Well make sure to build your home brick by boring brick_  
_Or the wolf's gonna blow it down_

Maybe that's why you're staying. Because nobody had ever _believed_ in you before this little boy turned up on your doorstep. So who cares if he _also_ believes in fairies and evil queens and the power of true love's kiss?

_Keep your feet on the ground_  
_When your head's in the clouds_

And the truth is you'd love to believe, too. You'd love to believe that your parents weren't some junkies and that they only abandoned you so you could escape the curse and come back to save them. You'd love to believe that Mary Margaret is your mother, because she's sweet and has faith in you and gave you the first home you've ever had.

_Well go get your shovel_  
_And we'll dig a deep hole_  
_To bury the castle, bury the castle_

And you'd also love to believe that Regina _is_ the Evil Queen, because it would make it so much simpler to hate her no matter what and not feel guilty about it. Not feel like you're just jealous of what she has. What you gave up a long time ago.

_Well you built up a world of magic_  
_Because your real life is tragic_  
_Yeah you built up a world of magic_

But it's not just about that, is it? You haven't been dreaming the way she scares everyone, the way she treats Henry, the way she uses him sometimes, right? After all, he didn't just take the bus to Boston on a whim. Or to go get the Savior. He came looking for affection, for someone who wouldn't disapprove of everything he is.

_If it's not real_  
_You can't hold it in your hand_  
_You can't feel it with your heart_  
_And I won't believe it_

And you don't. He's a wonderful kid, with great instinct. And after all, he's right that the clock started to work after you arrived in Storybrooke. He's right that bad things happen when people try to leave. And what if he's right about their happy endings too?

_But if it's true_  
_ You can see it with your eyes_  
_ Oh even in the dark_  
_ And that's where I want to be, yeah_

It took an abduction by a mad hatter to start you questioning your beliefs. Or well, non-beliefs. It felt awkward and ridiculous and it hurt a bit, but it was worth it. If only to see that look on Henry's face, when you asked him if you could hold on to the storybook for a while… Joy. And faith.

_Go get your shovel  
We'll dig a deep hole  
To bury the castle, bury the castle  
Well go get your shovel  
And we'll dig a deep hole  
To bury the castle, bury the castle  
Ba da ba ba da ba ba da  
Ba da ba ba da ba ba da_


	2. Without the song

It all starts with a wish. And shouldn't we all be careful what we wish for! 'Cause before you know it, a boy shows up at your door. Your boy. And not only do you not spend your twenty-eighth birthday alone, but pretty soon you get a feeling that you'll never be alone again.

That boy has a rich imagination, well, that's how Jiminy Cricket puts it anyway. But little by little, you find out maybe he's not _that_ crazy. Maybe he sees who people are on the inside more accurately than us rational grownups. Maybe he's right to call Regina evil, and maybe, just maybe, there is a curse on Storybrooke. If only metaphorically.

And what's so wrong about dreaming anyway? Just because you didn't get a chance to as a child, or well, ever, doesn't mean you should steal it away from Henry. Plus you're getting used to checking out what Regina does and considering the opposite as right.

But I guess you're scared that she might be right. That he may need to grow out of it, soon. And you still remember the terror you felt when he went into that old mine to get _proof_. Proof that the fairy tales in his storybook are true.

Maybe you should just save yourself the trouble and get the hell out. Hasn't that been your MO since, like, forever? The weird thing now is you _want _to stick around. You _want_ to be there for him and build a genuine relationship, brick by brick, for the first time in your whole life.

But what if you can't? What if you get his hopes up, then fall short and disappoint him? What if you blow it? Let's face it, you're no hero. You're a screw-up, always have been, always will be. Right?

Maybe that's why you're staying. Because nobody had ever _believed_ in you before this little boy turned up on your doorstep. So who cares if he _also_ believes in fairies and evil queens and the power of true love's kiss?

And the truth is you'd love to believe, too. You'd love to believe that your parents weren't some junkies and that they only abandoned you so you could escape the curse and come back to save them. You'd love to believe that Mary Margaret is your mother, because she's sweet and has faith in you and gave you the first home you've ever had.

And you'd also love to believe that Regina _is_ the Evil Queen, because it would make it so much simpler to hate her no matter what and not feel guilty about it. Not feel like you're just jealous of what she has. What you gave up a long time ago.

But it's not just about that, is it? You haven't been dreaming the way she scares everyone, the way she treats Henry, the way she uses him sometimes, right? After all, he didn't just take the bus to Boston on a whim. Or to go get the Savior. He came looking for affection, for someone who wouldn't disapprove of everything he is.

And you don't. He's a wonderful kid, with great instinct. And after all, he's right that the clock started to work after you arrived in Storybrooke. He's right that bad things happen when people try to leave. And what if he's right about their happy endings too?

It took an abduction by a mad hatter to start you questioning your beliefs. Or well, non-beliefs. It felt awkward and ridiculous and it hurt a bit, but it was worth it. If only to see that look on Henry's face, when you asked him if you could hold on to the storybook for a while… Joy. And faith.


End file.
